“I’m tired of begging for things I want”

” You told me think about it, well I did. Now I don’t wanna feel a thing anymore. I’m tired of begging for the things that I want. I’m oversleeping like a dog on the floor.”

(“King for a day by Pierce the Veil)

This quote is from one of my favourite songs and I find it quite appropriate for people in similar situations. I.e – “begging for the things that I want.” Is rather amusingly relatable when it comes to  ward rounds.

Today I was told that they would discuss me having my things (aka my phone mainly ) back. Although she didn’t explain the reasons before, now the ward manager  is saying theyre being wary with my stuff because they don’t know me long enough to know what’s risky and what isnt hence why they took even my phone away  (except for using it periodically, like I am now.) meanwhile, I wrote a list of “risk items” (aka what objects that are a risk personally for me) that the ward manager asked me to write and I gave it to her. 

I’m a bit nervous that I won’t get what I want. I guess it also depends who will be on shift tomorrow. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to sleep properly or not (- I tried to go to bed earlier – didnt work)

Anyway I shall continue to drink my iced decaff coffee and wait for my zopiclone and other sleeping tablets to kick in, because fuck I need them to!! Praying and hoping for the best.

Sending vibes of strength back out to my fellow bloggers ♡

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